Meaning of Marriage


What is the meaning of throwing a wedding banquet? Isn't it supposed to be, to get everyone together, the more the merrier, to congratulate you on your wedding day as well as get their blessings?

Bride's message to her 'not so close' friend about the too little wedding gift: 

Hi Tanya, how are you? I just want to know is there any reason or dissatisfaction of Mike's and I wedding that both you and Phil gave 50$ each? 
In terms of the amount we got from you both was very unexpected as a result we were very much short on paying off the reception because just for the cocktail + reception alone the plate per person is 200$ (as per a normal wedding range with open bar is about) and Mike and I both have already paid for everything else including decor, photography, attire etc and didn't expect we had to cover that huge amount for reception as well. As I know you both live together and work, so I did not see any reason for that amount, when it comes to your wedding hopefully you'll know what I mean.I hope for the best as from what we receive is what we will give back. Anyways, good luck on everything.

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I mean, seriously? Since when is it that the wedding guests have to be pressurised about this? The guests have no obligation to pay for your wedding! For goodness sake, it is YOUR wedding, which you should be prepared for the cost. If you are not doing very well, then why throw a big banquet that cost so much per person?

It's all about "image" isn't it? Let's see where is the image now after sending that kind of text to the friend. It is a bonus if the wedding gifts can cover the cost, and if it cannot, I really don't see any reason or situation that the partner has to be so furious about it.

You want your wedding to look like a fairytale, you want you wedding to be unforgettable, it is your own responsibility, why drag the guests in?

Can a wedding dinner determine the level of happiness of the rest of your marriage life? Is the bigger the wedding banquet, the more happiness you will get for the rest of your life? NO. wedding is only that one night that EVERYONE sees. No matter how grand your wedding is, people only see it for one night. So what if they go "awww the wedding night is so perfect and pretty" they would only talk about it for a few months, or give it a year.

And are you going to say it is once in a lifetime so you want to make it memorable? Who don't? I want my proposal and wedding to be memorable too. By memorable I mean going to the places that I want with the person that I love. After all, it's about the two of us. I believe the wedding can be more memorable even if you only have 20 guests. Getting married overseas with the one I love and family and important friends by my side, it is memorable enough.

Instead of throwing money for a grand wedding party where you don't know 80% of them, why not use the money to spend it on something more realistic?

If you have the money, and it is your culture to throw a big banquet for wedding, then good for you. But please remember that the guests are there to give their blessings to you, not to share the cost with you.

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